Every girl has an ideal image for themselves. Me.. I'm tall 5"10, I have great legs, a chest people pay thousands for, and a face guys fall for. but my weight.. it fluctuates, at my heighest weight i was 140 ... today.. Im marking my starting weight... at 125. This is just a guess as i don't own a scale and havent weighed myself in months but I think its 125 . I will double check this assumption tomorrow at the gym. Im just starting a new life, in a new city, completely alone. I think it's time to reinvent myself. since my weight fluctuates so much and because I am fairly active, Im thinking extreme measures must be taken. I am going to be brutally honest in this blog. I am not holding anything back but my identity, this is my private struggle I just need a place to sort my thoughts out.
tonight I bought 10 bottles of a liquid laxitive/purgative called citro-mag. it sells for 4.99 at my local grocery store, so its going to get pretty expensive. im thinking one bottle will last me 3 or 4 days. I have found that i cant make myself throw up, i have no gag reflexs it just doesnt happen. so hopefully this helps.
Tonight for dinner I ate a salad with some chicken on it. thats it. thats all i ate all day. i drank the alloted amount of citro mag which actually tastes like lemon water but really strong lemon taste before i ate and then about 10 minutes after i finished eating my stomach started feeling bubbly.. sure enough went to the bathroom and it all came up. it wasnt violent vomitting it just came up.
that was about two hours ago, and about 10 minutes ago i had to go to the bathroom again... this time it was the laxitive and not the purgative doing its work.. lovely. i feel unbloated. i feel cleaned out. its not a bad feeling.
so this is day one!
tomorrow i will head to the gym and weigh myself. i will give you a good starting weight and i will work down from there.
my goal weight is 103.
until tomorrow...
